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Bondage in Me

surrenderIt’s an unpleasant word: bondage. It brings up all kinds of lascivious images of chains and whips and leather. It’s the new interpretation of the word; it’s the culture in which we live. But in this case, it’s about slavery and compulsion and captivity. It is the antithesis to freedom.

During the time before you knew God, you were slaves to powers that are not gods at all. But now, when you are just beginning to know the one True God—actually, He is showing how completely He knows you—how can you turn back to weak and worthless idols made by men, icons of these spiritual powers? Haven’t you endured enough bondage to these breathless idols? [Galatians 4:8-9; The Voice translation]

And the phrase that I keep hearing is “haven’t you endured enough bondage . . . ” How much more do I need to experience before I finally set free from my old self, my old habits, my old way?

I have read that a body, once overweight, believes that higher weight is the norm. As a result, despite conscientious diet and exercise, the body will continue to betray and crave. It wants the old me back again: indulgent and insatiable.

Haven’t you endured enough? Haven’t I endured enough? I have.

I want everything that God has for me.

When I was just a baby believer, trying to figure out what it even meant to follow Christ and how it would change me . . . or, did I even want to change? No, not back then. Truthfully? I wanted everything to stay the same, just add in the Jesus bit. I thought I could treat Jesus like a spice, just sprinkle it on top. That is not how it works. Not really. And especially not if I say the words and surrender.

And I did. I waved the white flag back then and again and again and again. Each time, each year, a new surrender, a new discovery.

That’s been the journey; two steps forward, one step back. But I feel as though I am coming to a new place, a fork in my road, a new terrain. It’s like the last push before reaching the top of the mountain.

Ready.

sunday-school-jesusWhat does that really look like? Sometimes, my imagination carries me away and I think of my body as some kind of hollow, yet intricate cave where the Jesus of Sunday School paintings sits around and chats up all my body parts and memories. Absurd, I know. Or, how about one of those alien movies where the creature pops out of the chest or stomach? Yuk.

Now I have found the freedom to truly live for God. I have been crucified with the Anointed One—I am no longer alive—but the Anointed is living in me; and whatever life I have left in this failing body I live by the faithfulness of God’s Son, the One who loves me and gave His body on the cross for me. I can’t dismiss God’s grace, and I won’t.” [Galatians 2:19b-21a, The Voice translation]

The scriptures about Christ’s Spirit, that also being called the Holy Spirit or Spirit, is the stuff of non-traditional thinking. The Christian experience, the believer’s life, with the Presence of God within, is supernatural. It is just as “woo-woo” as any other Eastern beliefs or “new agey” talk. The walk with Christ is the stuff of transformation. Because it is full of paradox, it requires faith . . . of things not seen or even understood. Miracles are things that happen outside of the natural order. That’s the point.

Jesus withinThe difference is the affiliation. Do you engage with the other powers or do you engage with the power of the One God, manifest through the Christ and offered to the faithful . . . freely. The sacrifice is in letting go of “self.” But the “other powers” want the same thing. Who do you trust with your soul?

“For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.” [Ephesians 6:12, NIV] And when you see “heavenly realms,” think spiritual realms, the world within.

Inside My Tardis

tardisFor those of you who have never watched Dr. Who (is that possible after all these years?), the Tardis is a time machine/spacecraft that looks like an old British police box. One of the coolest things about the Tardis is that defies dimensionality: when you enter it, it is huge on the inside, despite its appearance on the outside. And so I imagine the “new heaven and new earth” in the book of Revelation.

I looked again and could hardly believe my eyes. Everything above me was new. Everything below me was new. Everything around me was new because the heaven and earth that had been passed away, and the sea was gone, completely. . . .A Voice said: See, the home of God is with His people. He will live among them; They will be His people,And God Himself will be with them. [Revelation 21: 1, 3, the Voice translation]

You see, somehow it made sense to me all at once today. We keep wanting to imagine all of this externally, the clouds rolling away and a gigantic new Jerusalemcube (New Jerusalem) coming in from outer space (based on some other descriptive passages). But I saw something else; I “saw” the expansion of all that is within me becoming this new home. I saw the kingdom within and saw that all is possible because it’s a world where there are no dimensions at all. It’s Human new: it’s Human with God, in God, and vice versa. It is God’s home.

And we will know God then in a way we cannot know God today. We will be changed.

Oh, how I wish I could be less restrained by my three-dimensional world. I name everything. I ground myself daily. I am entrenched. And so, I judge my world and the people in it. And each time I do, I am less free.

The life within, the relationship with Spirit within: in there is the light switch to a different way of living and seeing the world. If only . . .

Inside is the time machine and the Way.

Art by Brad Moody

Art by Brad Moody

Honestly, it never occurred to me that walking on water might be normal behavior. Think about it. The way the story goes, Jesus finished praying and then headed out by the most direct route (across the water) to meet up with his friends. It’s not like he stood at the shore and said to himself, “wait til they see this!” It was simply a means to an end. It could have been a true turning point for the disciples. Instead, it was one more picture lesson in faith.

O you of little faith. Why did you doubt and dance back and forth between following Me and heeding fear? [Matthew 14:31b, The Voice translation]

Most Christians, when they get a hold of the possibility that miracles are still possible today, focus on healing. After all, Jesus did a lot of healing and when faced with the pain and suffering of those around us, we want to help, we want to save them, we want to keep our loved ones with us. Heal them Father, we cry out. Have mercy.

When danger is before us, we cry out. When death is near, we shout. When fear feeds on our hearts, we beg for relief.

But no one, at least no one in my circle of friends, asks to walk on water. What’s the point? Walking on water won’t change the world around me, it won’t heal or alleviate suffering, it won’t bring the dead back to life, it won’t change anything. Except for myself.

That’s right. Walking on water is a personal transformation. It’s an assurance of faith within. It’s a breakthrough in surrender, full and complete. All in.

If I walk on water, then all is possible. It’s not the cliche of being perfect at all. It’s something totally different: it’s trust and fearlessness in the face of the natural laws of nature. It is outside 3-D experience. It is Spirit leading flesh, in charge. What it really means is to live in mutuality with the Holy Spirit. “At that time, you will know that I am in the Father, you are in Me, and I am in you.” [John 14:20

Walking on water is the antithesis of fear. Perfect love casts out fear [I John 4:18] and sets the stage for that journey.

Miracles and water walking are a natural outgrowth of a focused faith: love God, love others. This is our part of the bargain–the covenant. Simple. Impossible? Possible.

 

welcomeOf course, back in my day (the dark ages, I guess), people rarely moved in together without getting married. Or, if they did, it was on the sly or somehow covered up. Now, this “moving in” business is quite the norm, but I have to wonder, how does that transaction go? How do you decide to make the plunge?

The one who keeps God’s commands lives in him, and he in them. And this is how we know that he lives in us: We know it by the Spirit he gave us. [I John 3:24, NIV]

It’s not the same as marriage, not really. I mean, generally speaking, there is not formal document or witnesses to the decision.

Some people move in bit by bit. You know, he (or she) drinks a little too much and really shouldn’t drive home or it gets to be so late, that it’s more convenient to simply spend the night. And then some of the personal toiletries begin to appear and a couple of pairs of clean underwear and voila! A space in the closet, a favorite coffee cup, and an empty drawer. Won’t be long now.

Some people have a nice dinner and talk it over. They might even create plus/minus columns (in their heads) and talk through all the practical reasons to do it (cheaper in the long run, more convenient – or less – to work, better than phone call or skype, etc.)

Some people decide and then change up the place all together. Some people split their time between two places and have personal stuff at both. Some people move in and move out and then move in again. Lots of variety is possible when it’s temporary.

But the mutual arrangement with the Spirit is a little different. There is an invitation to move in, but the Spirit only abides in the areas we allow. If we want to close off the closets or the storage areas, if we want to keep one room for ourselves, if we want to put up “danger, keep out” signs on any part of our inner life, we can. Spirit is the ultimate roommate and partner.

If we ask.

There are only two rules: believe in the Christ, the son of God; and, love one another (other humans). No other clean up is expected. It’s not necessary to hide anything or wash the floors even. Spirit will come in and help with everything. If we allow it. If we want change, really. If we keep up our end: love God, love others.

Intimacy is not with the human form God (Jesus). Intimacy is with Spirit.

Whose voice will I listen to today?

An Unclear Destiny

Statue, Touching Heaven, Brussels

Statue, Touching Heaven, Brussels

As Christians, we are all taught that our God-given destiny is heaven, eternal life, and all that. I can remember, as a child, wondering why everyone thought being in heaven would be so wonderful if we were really just standing around worshiping God and singing all the time. Sounded boring to me. This is where humans are once again clueless.

My loved ones, we have been adopted into God’s family; and we are officially His children now. The full picture of our destiny is not yet clear, but we know this much: when Jesus appears, we will be like Him because we will see Him just as He is.  [I John 3:2; The Voice translation]

We have made up our destiny just like we have made up pictures of Jesus, angels, God, and even the devil. We keep putting them into our own understanding, our own limited imagination. We smile at Elijah’s “chariot of fire” as it whisks him off into the sky or John’s revelation of beasts covered in eyeballs. How primitive their interpretations, we think. But are we any better?

I am reading a fantasy book in which a young girl has been “glamored” with the appearance of human. She’s really faerie, a green pixie in fact. In those types of books, a glamor is an enchantment in which there is a corporate acceptance of what is seen. It is a covering or mask. It was one of the tricks of the Jedi too, to simply plant an idea in the mind of another of what he/she was really seeing.

The truth is, we have very few clues about heaven. Any description in scriptures has been filtered through human. There is much, much more, I’m sure of it. Heaven and eternal life are not extensions of what we are today.

I don’t mean to crudely disappoint those who have expectations of “seeing” their loved ones in heaven. I’m sure, in some state or another, we will encounter the family of God, but we will not look, feel, taste, or see the same. It’s not like this. It’s not here. And that’s the point.

Our destiny is to be like Christ who came to earth to reveal, just a little, of what true living is . . . what Spirit life does, how it works and what its impact is when applied to a 3-D world (hence: miracles). Of course, the norm of Spirit will appear to be a miracle: it’s outside of time and space.

I do not know my true destiny. This is the message of John’s letter. But when I get there, I will know and I will recognize the Christ. . . . and myself in a whole new way.

Art by Daniel Gerhartz

Art by Daniel Gerhartz

Intimacy is a charged word. Just having it as the title of this blog will get me hundreds of spam comments and false hits. It has been usurped by the sex trade. And yet, it’s the essence of a true relationship, an authentic kinship, a life-changing connection. The Voice translation says it best:

But if someone responds to and obeys His word, then God’s love has truly taken root and filled him. This is how we know we are in an intimate relationship with Him . . . [I John 2:5]

Now let me add my own tweaks to this verse: But IF I respond to and obey His word [the Christ], then God’s love has truly taken root and filled me. This is how I know I am in an intimate relationship with God.

Intimacy implies detailed knowledge of one another. It’s a given that the Spirit (living within me) has detailed knowledge of me. In fact, I’m pretty sure Spirit Christ knows me better than I know myself. But is it reciprocal? Do I know God? Of course not. I can only know what I am open to know. I can only know what is revealed through God’s actions and the Christ who walked the Earth to show us what God looks like in the flesh.

Here is God: follow me. That was Jesus’s message from the beginning, to each disciple: follow. Live the paradox. Love your enemies, go the second mile, love others as you love yourself, be devoted to God. Enter intimacy.

I am not a good friend. Not really.

I protect my heart from most people. Trust is slow. Betrayal feared.

But love requires an open heart, as does intimacy. One cannot come without the other and vice versa. Otherwise, they are both conditional.

My unconscious messages: I will love you if you don’t hurt me. I will expose my true self to you if you prove you are trustworthy. I would rather you not know me.

To have intimacy with God, I must practice with Human, for that is all we really have to work with. Except for pets. They’re easy. They already have the unconditional love part down pat. I am grateful for those small learnings over the years, at the least.

Come Lord Jesus. Teach this girl again. Open my heart. Give me courage to believe that my open heart will be protected in the shadow of your wings.

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